Episode Transcript
[00:00:01] Speaker A: Now, wait a minute. Now wait a minute.
[00:00:02] Speaker B: Elections. A final frontier. To boldly go and vote where no one has ever voted before.
Vote in place is so obscure. Your. Your votes have to be delivered by mail, by donkey. To vote in place is so remote that your votes have to be counted by a guy who's rapidly getting frostbite as he counts them.
[00:00:26] Speaker A: Frostbite. Oh, need the doctor. Get it. Vote for a doctor.
[00:00:30] Speaker B: Vote for a doctor. Vote for a lawyer. Vote for a congressperson that's already been elected once before.
But most importantly, vote. Or a starship captain. Because that's right, today we're voting in space.
[00:00:49] Speaker C: Voting in space.
[00:00:51] Speaker B: Voting in space.
It's the most important election of your life.
[00:00:57] Speaker C: This election, which will be, I do truly believe, the most important election of our lifetime.
[00:01:02] Speaker A: This is the most important election of our lifetime.
[00:01:06] Speaker B: This is the most important election.
[00:01:08] Speaker A: Don't you you hear that?
This is the most important election in our lifetime.
[00:01:14] Speaker C: I definitely think it's the most important election of my lifetime.
[00:01:17] Speaker B: This is the most important election of our times.
[00:01:21] Speaker C: Politicians say every time, this is the most important election. This one's really that important.
[00:01:26] Speaker B: I'm Kennedy Cooper, and as always, I am joined by in house statistician Andrew Fields. Andrew, hello.
[00:01:33] Speaker A: Remember, Remember, in space, nobody can hear you vote for. So vote for whoever you want to.
Your husband doesn't have to know.
[00:01:42] Speaker B: And I couldn't be more excited. Today we have an absolutely phenomenal guest.
We have somebody who you've probably read her words at some point, perhaps in the form of an article or a book or a play. We've got Claire Willett on the show. Thank you so much for being here. Claire. Oh, my God. Yes.
I'm just. I'm so shocked and honored that you have come to our humble voting booth here today. I'm sorry for all the Cheeto dust on the ballots.
[00:02:19] Speaker A: Listen, why are you looking at me like that?
[00:02:21] Speaker B: Kennedy, I'm looking at you for a reason. I'm not gonna say why.
[00:02:29] Speaker A: Okay, everybody. If I disappear five minutes from now, and if a fake will. If a will comes up, it's fake. Kennedy faked it. Okay, Just. Just. Okay. Like, everybody just know.
[00:02:40] Speaker B: Oh, look at this. Andy. It's so generous of you to leave me all these things. Wow.
[00:02:45] Speaker A: You can't have my Nintendo Switch Go Switch video games.
[00:02:52] Speaker B: Claire, you are quite the accomplished Chaos Muppet.
[00:02:57] Speaker A: Thank you.
[00:02:58] Speaker C: Yes. That is spiritually how I identify.
[00:03:01] Speaker A: That just sounds like the really cool hard bonus boss that you have to work hard to face up against the Chaos Muppets.
[00:03:08] Speaker B: I always love seeing that at the top of your profile. It's just.
[00:03:13] Speaker C: It is. I think I take that role seriously. It's an honor and a privilege to be a chaos Muppet.
[00:03:18] Speaker B: Claire, you have worked on so many projects, and I feel like if people don't know about you, that's kind of on them in some ways. But also, I do love to give people a chance to talk about something they might be working on early in the show, just in case some rude listeners don't listen all the way to the end.
I know, I know, I know.
Do you have anything exciting coming up you'd like to tell us about before we get into talking about Star Trek?
[00:03:50] Speaker C: Well, I'm always happy to talk about Star Trek, but yes.
So, yeah. I'm Claire Willett. I'm a writer in Portland, Oregon. The biggest project that I'm working on now and through really probably through the end of next year, is finishing a trilogy of time travel sci fi books about Watergate.
[00:04:11] Speaker B: We love this.
[00:04:16] Speaker A: Why? I don't even know our gates.
[00:04:19] Speaker B: It's not just so far up my alley personally, which is part of why you're here today, but it's. I feel that the average listener of this show, if you haven't already been aware of the time travel Watergate books, you're gonna hear time travel Watergate. They're perking up right now like a cat that just heard a can opener.
[00:04:41] Speaker C: You know, It does feel like it's right in the wheelhouse of, like, this is my target audience.
[00:04:54] Speaker A: That wacky space. Richard Nixon, time traveling.
[00:05:00] Speaker B: You're of course referring to the Rewind Files.
[00:05:04] Speaker C: Yes, the new title. We're revising it for Republication. It's going to be called Chronomaly, which is their word for like a gl glitch in the time stream that the agents have to go back and correct. Okay, so we're rewriting the first one, and then there's a sequel that I'm in the process of revising and then a third book that I haven't written yet. And I just recently learned, which is very exciting, that I received literary fellowship from the Miller foundation here in Oregon for $25,000 to support me to be able to finish the books next year. So that was very exciting.
[00:05:37] Speaker B: Amazing.
[00:05:38] Speaker A: Wow.
[00:05:40] Speaker B: It's so cool when the government actually does something useful like supporting art. Oh.
[00:05:45] Speaker A: Oh, come on, Kennedy. We all know the government can't do that.
[00:05:49] Speaker C: This is a private foundation. The government had no hands in this.
[00:05:52] Speaker B: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's so good when anyone supports art.
[00:05:56] Speaker C: Yes, exactly. When the government does nothing. And so individuals have to step in to fill in that gap. I'm a grant writer, so that's like kind of my whole job is like, what is the government not doing that we have to find money for somewhere else?
[00:06:08] Speaker B: Yes. I'm also in grant writing and it's a very strange time to be.
[00:06:12] Speaker C: Oh boy. Yes. We could have a whole separate podcast just on that voters are home.
[00:06:18] Speaker A: This is a really tough, important job right now that you really shouldn't be taking for granted.
[00:06:23] Speaker C: Zing.
[00:06:26] Speaker B: Ooh, editor. You know what to do.
Yeah. This is the comedy show. So we'll move away from grant writing for now, but maybe that'll be a topic for some other conversation.
[00:06:39] Speaker A: I make jokes. Maybe I'll make a good one someday.
[00:06:42] Speaker B: Because if we get into grant writing, I'll just, I'll spend the whole show yelling instead of just, oh boy.
[00:06:48] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:06:50] Speaker B: Yeah. So all of that's very exciting and thank you so much for sharing all that, these wonderful projects and updates about the projects with us and our listeners. Let's talk a little about a teensy tiny sci fi television series.
[00:07:09] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:07:10] Speaker B: Perhaps some people will have heard of this.
[00:07:12] Speaker A: Okay.
[00:07:13] Speaker B: Star Trek.
[00:07:14] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, that's the, that's the franchise that we celebrate on May 5th, right?
[00:07:19] Speaker B: Yes, May the fifth. Long and prosper. So.
[00:07:25] Speaker C: Yes, that's exactly right.
[00:07:30] Speaker B: Claire. I love Star Trek. And in fact, Star Trek is probably one of the subjects just by coincidence. Not because I've done a Star Trek specific show, but just by chance. It's probably one of the subjects I've podcasted about the most. It's not number one, but it's definitely in the top five or top ten. What makes you love Star Trek? What made you decide Star Trek would be the thing that we would discuss today?
[00:07:51] Speaker C: Well, it is. I mean, really, I consider Star Trek to be like a load bearing component of my whole personality. I.
I'm in my early 40s, so I grew up on TNG. Like that was the Trek that was airing, like when I was a child watching it in real time. So I was very much sort of formed by like the sort of the Picard era crew. I didn't watch the original series until really, like probably within the last five or six years or so. I sort of looped back around to it, but yeah, watched Next Generation all through, you know, elementary school, middle school, and then Deep Space Nine was when I was like, that was sort of circa my high school era. So Major Kira was like My formative lesbian crush. Like, very spiritually important to me.
And. Yeah. And I. And we sort of are living through a Star Trek renaissance that many of us who grew up in that era, like, did not think that we would ever get to see. Like, I love lower decks. I love Prodigy.
I love Discovery. I know, like, that is sort of a contrarian take in some circles, but I really enjoyed it.
So. Yeah. So I have seen. The only one I have not seen is Enterprise. So if you're asking questions about Enterprise, I will be just making stuff up and pulling it out of my ass.
[00:09:09] Speaker A: Okay, Kennedy, we need to ask questions about Enterprise. I know.
[00:09:16] Speaker C: Just to stump Claire. Yeah, but no, I think, like, in terms of, like, why I love this franchise, sort of above and beyond. I mean, like, I also, like, I love Star Wars. I love all the things, but I love Star Trek specifically because, like, Star Trek is for Ernest dorks, and I am an earnest dork. Like, it is not like, they all just. They truly believe that, like, it's like, teamwork and pacifism and, like, becoming friends with people that are different than you. And, like, these starships are these little, like, found families of weirdos who didn't quite fit in on their home planet for some reason. And then they, like, run away from home and, like, find their people and, like, become their whole selves. And it's just beautiful. With the exception of Deep Space Nine, which is like, a whole other tone and vibe and, like, Frontier Politics and much more, like, a little darker. But they're all. But it's also still, like, just like a ship full of weirdos. So I just. And I just think that's beautiful. So I. It's sort of woven into my whole life and very much shaped like the other shows that I like and the other books that I read, very much like how I am as a sci fi writer.
And so I feel like, you know, you can sort of.
I think of it in terms of, like, I'm often thinking about, like, how things in the real world, like, sort of connect to Star Trek, but then also you can just, like, watch it and be like, this is just goofy and silly and fun and enjoy it on that level. And, like, that's also fine, you know?
[00:10:43] Speaker B: Yeah, I agree. It has a lot to offer.
Yeah. I like what you said about, like, Found Family, and I think that there's a lot of, you know, I think there's a lot of people that see themselves in aspects of that part of it in particular, because that Found Family part really covers a lot of different things. And so, you know, you have representation of disability and neurodivergence.
You have representation of queerness. You have representation of different ethnic and cultural backgrounds and how those can sometimes clash but ultimately find unity and harmony.
You have, you know, just a lot of these different things kind of like represented in ways that I think a lot of people. I think there's a reason why it resonates with so many people on the relative political left, you know, that, you know, a lot of folks have had some experience like that, or they saw that show and then they realized that that's what they wanted or, you know, some combination of those trains meeting.
[00:11:45] Speaker C: I think so too.
[00:11:47] Speaker A: You could say space communism. Kennedy.
Listen, my unrelated but statistics unfun fact is, while we may all know the character Data and we refer to him as singular, the actual term data is plural, and the singular of data is datum.
Okay, I just had to. I had to justify my statistic.
[00:12:12] Speaker B: You know, it had been named Datum.
[00:12:15] Speaker C: That doesn't have nearly the same ring to it.
[00:12:18] Speaker B: But then you could have been like, date. I hardly know.
[00:12:22] Speaker A: I would like on the record.
Why did you. A bad pun. Why are you mad at me? Oh, sorry. Force of habit. Just on the record, that one was not me.
[00:12:33] Speaker B: So I think that there's a really great.
Also, you know, there's a lot that can be discussed and has been discussed at length on many other podcasts, and we're going to try not to retread too many. Too much ground that too many people have walked over before today. But, you know, I think there is something to be said for the fact that Star Trek both presents a certain amount of idealism and has its flaws, both internal flaws that are like, within the show and meant to be like problems that are faced and external flaws that are like things that the producers did that were not good and stuff like that. Right.
And so, like, you know, it is this thing that it sort of mixes.
Like I say, it sort of encapsulates a lot of idealism and there's this sort of underbelly to it that you have to sometimes talk about, think about, discuss in different ways that has its own aspects to it. And that made it kind of an interesting thing to consider for something to discuss in a political context today, because that applies to a few different things in our world. But I really felt the thing that it applied to best is the United States Post Office, okay?
[00:13:53] Speaker A: The after office.
Not to be confused with the pre office.
[00:14:00] Speaker B: Not to be confused with any pre offices. Correct.
[00:14:03] Speaker A: Yes.
[00:14:04] Speaker B: So, you know, the post office, I think, has this sort of extremely positive quality in our modern times. And we tend to look at it in a very relatively, like, strong, like, save the post office kind of lens on the left, I would say, in like, 2025 right now, like, there's still. There's a lot of that kind of, like, momentum and feeling. And I'm not saying this in any way to try to disagree with any of that feeling, because the modern post office is a thing that we should save. But much like how Star Trek has these weird elements to it that, you know, kind of underlie and in some ways undermine the utopianism, the post office has a very complex history and is a very. Is a very complicated entity.
So I thought that that made it a good analogy. I also thought it was a good analogy because of, you know, the Federation itself is sort of a force for spreading communication in some ways. Right.
[00:15:11] Speaker C: I like this. There's. There is. Yeah. Ooh, this is. There's a lot in this. Yes, yes. I'm very excited. Where should we start?
[00:15:18] Speaker A: The one thing I like, Kennedy, you could do your thing, but this is something. No, no, no.
[00:15:22] Speaker B: Get into the post office. Yeah.
[00:15:24] Speaker A: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Just. I guess it would be better because when we were planning this episode, our editor and Kennedy were like, stuff. Star Trek. Star Trek. Star Trek. And I was like, post office. Post office. Post office. Post office. I do like the post office. But here's the one thing. Voters at home. The post office is in the Constitution.
It is in the Constitution. It was put there in those papers. It is actually in the Constitution. So when we talk about privatizing the post office.
Okay, so I'm not stupid. Like, the government does all sorts of illegal shit, but there are various degrees of what they can get away with. Like, of course they can get away with. With. What the fuck? How do they pull that off?
And then privatizing the post office would be the. What the fuck? How do they pull that off? Because it is in the Constitution. The first post office general was a little shocking. Fellow Shocking.
[00:16:25] Speaker B: Editor. Editor.
[00:16:27] Speaker A: Shocking editor. Why? I hardly even know her. But, yeah, it's been this huge thing that is part of the Constitution that has been a major part that gradually gone up with respect over time and with importance over time.
Yeah, you could. What would you like to talk about? The post office, Kennedy? Keep me focused.
[00:16:53] Speaker B: Well, I think one of the cool things about or one of the fascinating things about it being this constitutionally obligated thing that I'd love to hear everybody's thoughts on is the universal service obligation, which is its own sort of strict binding code, not unlike the Prime Directive or something like that, in a way that, you know, enforces, you know, price and quality of delivery and which leads to things like situations where you have Right now in 2025, a mail being delivered to a remote group of people in the. That live in the Grand Canyon by donkey. Because you have to guarantee mail delivery to everybody.
[00:17:42] Speaker A: Neil. But yes, otherwise. Yeah, sorry.
[00:17:45] Speaker B: Oh yeah, mule. My bad.
[00:17:47] Speaker A: Yeah. But yeah, it's this great thing.
Part of the reason why. So like there's this seeming contradiction with evil conservatives. Oh, sorry.
The redundancy department just called with conservatives who want to privatize the post office and but they also say the post office isn't profitable. And like the contradiction. The seeming contradiction people like to point is how these two go against each other. But they don't. The point of the post office is to lower the prices of what private can charge. So FedEx and UPS would be much more expensive if it wasn't for the post office keeping the prices low.
[00:18:38] Speaker B: But that sounds kind of anti capitalist.
[00:18:42] Speaker A: Listen, listen, we have socialism in this episode after all. We were trying not to, but we got a little socialism as a treat.
But yeah. And like certainly the way we have it, there's always been a need for some private where the goal should be to improve the public services, of course, but to sometimes fill the gaps. Like you might be familiar with the Pony Express that was a privatized delivery that the US did need for a hot minute because this was the point in time in which we had California. We had all this non state territory in between and then we had all the other states. How the fuck do you get in communication with California? Oh, you got these cowboys. Whoa. And they were essential because the Civil War that they were necessary to keep in contact with California during the Civil War.
But the thing about them is how long do you think the Pony Express was a thing? Like how long do you think it.
[00:19:51] Speaker B: Was Has a lot of cultural impact.
[00:19:53] Speaker A: So yeah, it is.
[00:19:55] Speaker B: Claire, what do you think? How long was the Pony Express?
[00:19:57] Speaker C: Around 50 years and blindly guessing less than two years.
[00:20:03] Speaker A: Fewer than two years. That's the Grammarly way. Yeah. 18 months I believe.
So even though it is this thing that had this huge importance once we got other things set up, we didn't really. It went bankrupt. It had its very brief time. It wasn't that it was very important.
[00:20:20] Speaker C: Wild to me.
[00:20:22] Speaker A: Yeah.
You think it sounds like. I mean it sounds like it was the Original post office the way that we did.
[00:20:27] Speaker C: Right, right.
[00:20:28] Speaker A: Yeah, it was important for the Civil War, but once we got the telegraph set up between that place, like.
[00:20:39] Speaker B: We.
[00:20:39] Speaker A: Needed them to bring California in. But to put it in contrast, a few days before Lincoln's reelection, Nevada officially became a state and it sent its constitution over to the.
Over to the country's capital via telegram.
That one.
And that was a period of four years. We went from needing the Pony Express to just advances of technology bringing the. So, yeah, time moves on and we think technology today is crazy.
[00:21:20] Speaker B: Yeah, it was moving pretty fast back then too.
So what do you think, Claire? Do you feel a little bit more informed about the post office, perhaps?
[00:21:28] Speaker C: Well, I, I have certainly learned some things that shook me. I really thought the Pony Express was like how we did things for a century.
[00:21:36] Speaker B: Right. I thought so too. For a long time.
[00:21:38] Speaker C: I'm gonna be noodling on that for a long time. That really, I mean, I guess it's. It is like, that's such a hilarious example of how like the pop culture iconography of things makes them seem like they were actually a lot more historically important than they were. Like. Yeah, I kind of only know the Pony Express from like Bugs Bunny cartoons. Right. Like, I don't. I don't really have real knowledge of it. I only know it from like, it's like a meme, you know, but it feels really important. It feels like a load bearing component of like our whole, like.
[00:22:09] Speaker B: Yeah, it was relatively important because it was crucial for getting California on board for the Civil War. And then. But by, by about, I want to say like six months. It wasn't even the full Civil War. It's like six months into the Civil War. The transcontinental telegraph exists and the pony.
But that, but that lead up to the Civil War. Being able to get a message to California in 10 days was a really big.
[00:22:35] Speaker A: California has always been a huge problem to the United States. I'm sorry, California. I was born in California.
You want to know why California is a trouble to the world? Because it brought me.
But yeah, like, I mean, it's especially baffling to me because the usual thing that leftists like to point out is how short the Confederacy was. Well, the Confederacy was longer than the Pony Express. That doesn't happen. Everything, everything else is supposed to be longer than the Confederacy.
[00:23:08] Speaker C: It's like this TV show ran for three and a half confederacies. That's how we should be able to measure things. Yeah.
Oh boy. So I'm immediately, I am thinking of a million different sort of Star Trek connections to all of these things. I don't know if you want me to jump in now or if we have more history to learn, and then we can kind of loop back to the Star Trek of it all at the end.
[00:23:30] Speaker B: Okay, go right ahead. I've got some prompts that'll help guide us. But, like, if you're ready to pop off, pop off. We're. We're gonna. We're gonna move right into the voting booth, grab our ballots. Let's do this. Claire, what do you got?
[00:23:45] Speaker A: No, I'm. No, no, no. I'm not going into the voting booth. I'm voting by mail today. Kennedy.
[00:23:51] Speaker C: Oh, yeah, that's in honor of me. Cause I'm from Oregon.
[00:23:55] Speaker A: Staying out. We are all voting by mail today.
[00:23:59] Speaker C: That's right. I've never been in a voting booth before. We just sat down and did it at our kitchen table with our little pencils, like, voting as a family. I have never been in a physical voting, but this is very exotic for me.
[00:24:10] Speaker A: Okay, you can go to the physical voting booth.
[00:24:12] Speaker C: But I. Yeah, just one. So I can say I did.
I do.
[00:24:17] Speaker B: Like, although I love the convenience of mail voting and we should all have access to it at all times, I personally do enjoy, from time to time, going down on election day and vote, waiting in the line and voting, just because sometimes it's interesting to see the vibes. But anyway, I don't mean to derail us. Claire, what you got for us? What do you think?
[00:24:39] Speaker C: So. So a few different sort of unrelated things that I'm thinking about in terms of how communication and the technology of communication affects both just, like, narrative in Star Trek, but also affects, like, what the Federation is. So first I have to say. So this is very personally exciting for me that the post office is the topic that you guys chose, because in my Star Trek book club Discord, I have a friend named Ryan who works for the post office. And so I am also weirdly, specifically informed on what it's like to work for the post office right now because we get, like, daily reports from Ryan on, like, routes changing, and they're, like, super overstaffed. And so he has to, like, run two roots today. And, like, who has their own truck and who has to borrow. It's like, all this sort of, like, wonky nuances of, like, mailman workplace stuff, like, we talk about all the time. So Ryan's gonna be very excited to hear this.
So a couple things, when you were talking about California and the telegraph sort of opening up communications there. Obviously, like, the first place that my mind went in terms of that kind of piece of the story is Deep Space Nine, which is for any. For the three listeners maybe, who have not heard of the show. The difference between Deep Space Nine and the rest of the Star Trek franchises is all the rest of them are set on a ship. And Deep Space Nine is like a frontier space station.
[00:26:05] Speaker B: So the.
[00:26:06] Speaker C: The Federation, the sort of wormhole space anomaly to another quadrant opens up and the Federation wants dibs on it. And so they take over this abandoned Cardassian station after the Cardassians have rolled out because they've just ended an occupation of the planet that the station is over. And. And so the whole show there is this sort of jockeying back and forth over, like, you know, whose territory this is, who owns the wormhole, the Federation and the Bajorans and the Cardassians, and. And then who comes through the wormhole from the other side and everyone kind of like, you know, head to head over who owns this little corner of space who can kind of control what happens here. But one of the things that comes up a lot is that, like, it is a deep space station. It is very remote. And so things like how long it takes them to get news, how long it takes them to, like, if something goes wrong on Deep Space nine, then they have to, like, call in the cavalry. Like, they need, you know, a ship in the area to come and help them out if they're under attack or how long to get the fleet here.
[00:27:07] Speaker B: Things like that ship ain't getting there right away.
Oh, God, that ship ain't getting there right away.
[00:27:12] Speaker A: I tell you what, that ship just ain't right.
[00:27:15] Speaker C: And so I think. So that was sort of like, thinking about, like, you know, and also, like, I'm from Oregon. And so when I sort of think about, like, Civil War era America, like the sort of mythology of the west, right, the frontier towns and like, and how, like, the sort of central and eastern parts of the United States sort of claimed dibs on the parts of the west that they wanted to be, you know, colonizing and populating while there were these enormous distances between them like that, that really, like, claiming territory precipitates communications technology in a lot of ways. Like what you're saying about, like, developing the telegraph to make sure that they could, like, keep their hands in California. I, you know, it made me think a lot about, like, in, in Star Trek. One of the things that I think is, and this is important, I think, to all, all good Sci fi, you have to give, like the gizmos have to have reasonable limits, right? And it's the same with fantasy too, with magic. Like, you don't want a magical system that has like no constraints on it. And it's just like anyone can just do anything because like that not interesting. And so in sci Fi it's the same with technology.
The technology has to have some degree of constraint so you can still have problems that have to be solved. And so in Star Trek, subspace relays and subspace communication, the sort of, which makes sense, these sort of relays that are through space and you sort of ping pong, your signal goes from like, I'm on the USS Farragut and I'm choosing, trying to like fax my bestie on the Enterprise. And so like I send a message and it finds the nearest relay and then it ping pongs from there to like another relay and from there to another relay and then from there to like wherever in space my friend is. And then some, you know, between minutes and weeks later, really, depending on how far apart these people are. And then like you get your message, you know. So interference with subspace relays is something that we see a lot of in Star Trek episodes in terms of you're trying to, you're at war and someone's trying to cut you off, or we have to get a message to the Admiralty to send us more ships and it's like we can't because subspace signals are jammed.
How communication is affected when you are that far out and you're that remote comes up a lot in Deep Space Nine episodes where something goes wrong and they are totally on their own. They're cut off from the rest of like the Empire is too far away to like, you know, I think that for. So like when you have something like the Federation, like Starfleet, right? Like this sort of enormous monumental force, you know, thousands of ships and millions and billions of people.
It's like a thousand different worlds, right? So you, in order for there to be stakes to something like our station is being invaded, you have to be able to plausibly explain, explain away why, like, okay, well like, why can't you just call 500ships to like come in and come to the rescue?
And it's because like when you are the frontier station and it's going to take everybody, you know, a week and a half to get to you and by then it's too late, you're very much on your own. And so I think that they do use that distance and those communication technology limits on Deep Space Nine in a really interesting way to kind of explain and create sort of story problems that the characters have to solve where they are. Like, we have nothing except, like, what we have right here on this station. There's no ships coming. No one's coming to save us. We have only our own resources. Go. And I think that's really interesting.
[00:30:59] Speaker A: You're really interesting.
[00:31:03] Speaker B: We thought a lot about both Deep Space Nine and Voyager while we were writing this episode, because those are two of the series that have some of the most interesting relationships to communication. And, yeah, Deep Space Nine is very much modeled after, you know, shows like Frontier Town back in the day or something more modern like Yellowstone, where, you know, you have that vibe of that western frontier town that is cut off. And what do you do if something really bad happens?
There's something very interesting to that, for sure. And definitely communication is a big deal in both of those settings. Right. In real life, you have, you know, in the. In the west, you have these small towns that were very cut off, that got swept up into the Civil War, and then suddenly they have telegraphs in town, and it's a totally different thing. And we kind of see a parallel to that in Deep Space Nine. So I'm really glad that you took to all this, and I think that you'll like some of these questions that I've got prepared for us. So the first and foremost one really just draws from some of the basic topics we've been working with here. Which is. Which do you think is stricter? The Prime Directive or the Universal Service obligation?
Do you think. Do you think that you're held to a higher standard to get that mail to everybody or to not mess up. Not mess up another planet? Because both get messed up sometimes.
[00:32:40] Speaker C: Yeah. Like, I'm. What I have immediately, of course, gone to is, like, all of the flagrant exceptions to the rule, I guess. So here's. Here's what I'll say. I'm going to say the universal service obligation.
And the reason for that is, like, the Prime Directive. Like, the Prime Directive seems to only really be a rule for starship captains, right? Like, if you are not in a position where you are going to another world or civilization and making first contact with an alien species, which is like, a small percentage of everybody who lives in the Federation, then, like, you could live a whole life, and the Prime Directive, like, never comes up for you. Like, I could be, like a San Francisco barista on the Starfleet Academy campus, and that will never come up for me once in my life, but, like, I still want my goddamn male, you know?
[00:33:28] Speaker B: Right.
[00:33:29] Speaker C: So I feel like it is.
I think that the.
The obligation of a service that affects everybody in your entire system. So, like, everybody in the United States and our relationship with the post service, postal service, where it is like, that is like a basic sort of human right of, like, living in this society. And like you were saying about the, like, delivering to the Grand Canyon by mule, some of the stuff they have to do to get mailed to people in, like, rural Alaska is crazy. You know, there are people with. On, like. Like jet skis and helicopters to get to these places that are, like, snowed in. And that's really remarkable when you think about, like, how incredibly big America is and how many different kinds of geography it has. So I feel like that, because that is, like, everybody gets mail. Everybody deserves the right to have their mail. And. And also sort of tangentially to this, although this gets away from the USPS of it all, but these are also a lot of the same conversations that we're having these days with rural broadband access, you know, with, like, who get. Who deserves access to the Internet, which, like, should also be a right, like the telephone, like, that we sort of made a decision at some point as a society that the ability to communicate, to have mail, to have a phone, all of those kinds of things, everybody needs that because you kind of can't live without it. Whereas, like, the Prime Directive is like. It is of monumental history, changing importance for, like, 16 people at a time, right? Like. Like, if you are currently the captain of a starship, this is one of those things where you're like, boy, if I fuck this up, I'm ruining this planet's entire course of development.
[00:35:11] Speaker B: It will be generous. It's maybe more like 150 people, you know.
[00:35:20] Speaker C: Fair, fair, fair, but still. But proportionally a very small number.
[00:35:24] Speaker B: That's me being generous. I mean.
[00:35:27] Speaker C: Yeah, no, totally. Yeah. So. So I guess. So to me, I feel like. I think that there is a. There is a higher obligation on, to me, on services that affect the whole of your population and society, rather than, like, I think that you have to hold to that more because, like, then your whole infrastructure falls apart without it. Whereas I think that things that you're, like, if you opt into being a starship captain, you are choosing to be held to a higher bar. Like, rules apply to you that don't come up for all the rest of us. But I feel like the stuff that keeps the lights on and the water running for regular Joe Schmo Federation citizens is, like, enormously important because if you don't have that and, like, why are we in the Federation? If we're not benefiting from participating in this system, then, like, why are we here? You know?
[00:36:20] Speaker B: Whoa, whoa, whoa. That's. You're asking dangerous questions.
Very good answer.
Oh, Andy, were you going to weigh in? Sorry.
[00:36:29] Speaker A: I just want to say, voters at home, my discord shut off and I'm deeply suspicious of Kennedy. Do you still have that fake will?
Are you trying to do something funny?
I got my eyeballs on you. Continue.
[00:36:47] Speaker B: No comment.
Okay, if we were to transport one Star Trek crew back in time to run the pony express and keep California informed about the state of the Union, which Star Trek crew would you entrust this responsibility to?
[00:37:05] Speaker C: Oh, okay.
Interesting. Interesting question. I.
I want to say Picard's crew, but I also know that I am.
I'm. I'm. My, My instinct was to go there because I'm just like, those guys time travel a lot and they have definitely been to the 1800s because they had that whole Mark Twain thing.
So I don't know if I'm just, like, assuming an ability to, like, assimilate that doesn't actually really exist, but I. Yeah, actually, let's go with them. So the reason for that is I think.
I think that there are a number of people on that crew who are nerds about history. And Picard being himself a huge nerd at the sort of top of the pyramid, I think also helps.
So I think that in terms of, you know, if you're sort of general time travel, rules of engagement, right? Like, we have to, like, preserve this thing so that the future doesn't collapse.
Then you need people who can really, like, who have sort of an understanding of, like, here are all the things that will go wrong if we fail to, you know, execute whatever, you know, A, B and C.
You do have the problem, of course, with that crew of like, a bunch of people who don't look like humans.
So, you know, Data, I guess you can put makeup on him. It's hard to know what to do with Worf, but that's, you know, that's their problem. But I think that they always Hard.
[00:38:39] Speaker B: To know what to do with Worf.
[00:38:41] Speaker C: Well, it's true.
[00:38:42] Speaker A: That's a weird donkey you've got there. That's a weird horse you've got there.
[00:38:47] Speaker C: But I think they're. Yeah, I feel like they're also. I guess. So here's. Yeah, now I'm thinking, thinking a Lot of them talking about. Here's why. I think I'm doubling down on that answer. The Picard Next Generation crew are all pretty consistently. Because this is sort of the ethos of the show. They are very like, they are sort of uniformly pro Federation in a way that some of the other shows, like, push back harder on the very concept of, like, what the Federation is. So if we're understanding that the goal of this exercise is, is like, we are pro California being in the Union, right? Like, we are pro this project of westward expansion that would require that it would be somebody who is like, I'm on board with, like, this. Like, I'm. I am in favor of this institution and what it is doing.
And the institutionalist Star Trek, I think is Next Gen. That's not like, not in a bad way. Like, I love them. I have deep nostalgia for that show. And Beverly Crusher is one of my favorite TV women of all time. But I do think that there is a. And we do get some episodes where, like, you have, like, a shitty admiral here and there or, like, ethical questions about, like, what the Federation is doing on various planets. But by and large, that is a show where, like, you come away with it feeling like the Federation is a good in the world. And I think that that lines up to me with, like, in the era of the Civil War, the people on the Union side were like, the Union is a good in the world. Like, it is a net good to bring California into our society. And I feel like ideologically those things to me line up and they were wrong.
[00:40:38] Speaker A: We should have forgotten California. We should have cut it off.
But excellent point overall.
[00:40:44] Speaker B: Yeah. No, I think, though, I think those points were strong and compelling and I have no, I have no counter argument to that. That is better than that.
Hard is just. Hey, I don't know how to put this other than he's just shady enough for the job.
Yes.
[00:41:00] Speaker C: Yeah, exactly.
[00:41:01] Speaker A: Yeah, shut up, Wesley.
[00:41:05] Speaker B: Shady enough and nerdy enough. It's like that combo. You ever, you ever known a nerd that, like, sold drugs?
[00:41:15] Speaker C: It is. It's always really funny that I think, you know, people remember, like, Kirk as being this sort of chaotic fuck boy and Picard being like a real stuffed shirt. And I think that's just because he's British, because in actuality, like, Picard has, like, Picard's lore from, like, you know, when he was younger. And all the flashbacks of, like, Picard is like a deeply character, chaotic creature at times. And Kirk was like, literally described as a stack of books with Legs by his high school best friend. Like, Kirk was like a real, real nerd who had to be like, taught how to be charming and whereas Picard was just like getting in knife fights in college. So I do think that like he has, yeah, like he has more of an edge to him.
Like that's not just a bald British man. Like, that is also a guy who will, like, if he believes that he's on the right side of things, like the morally right side of things, like, he will absolutely fuck with you.
[00:42:12] Speaker B: Yeah, I give this hot. Take any chance I can, but like Picard is actually the captain I'd be like most nervous to be on the ship with.
[00:42:22] Speaker C: Engage.
[00:42:24] Speaker A: Engage.
[00:42:25] Speaker B: I don't know what the fuck is going to happen on that ship.
[00:42:31] Speaker A: Kennedy, look. Okay, engage.
[00:42:36] Speaker B: Yeah. Who do you think would deliver your space package on time and with the least damage? Federation, Klingon Empire? Romulans, Ferengi or Cardassians? We're putting them in the pit. Let's go.
[00:42:51] Speaker C: Okay, so this is, this is a great question. So I, in, in general, like, I would say as a broad rule, I would say Romulans, I would say the Ferengi. If the.
I mean, I can't imagine that the Ferengi have like, public services that are not like, don't have a financial component. So I feel like I'm going to trust a Ferengi if it is financially to his benefit that the package arrives undamaged. Like if there is sort of a.
If his compensation scale in some way is like, impacted by like what condition it arrives in or how prompt it is, though, I. Then also, you have the possibility that he might decide that it is better to just steal it and resell it on the black market.
Klingons, I simply don't believe that they care about mail. Like, I don't. I don't think that they care that much about possessions, kind of just in general.
But Romulans are like ruthlessly efficient motherfuckers. You know, like, Romulans, as we all obviously know, share a genetic root with Vulcan. So they have that same kind of like, rigidity, but they don't, they didn't do the like, sort of peaceful way of logic thing. They were like, no, we're gonna be like single minded, violent, ruthless motherfuckers and, and like split off from them. But they have that same like, you know, they're incredibly precise. They know exactly what they want. You do not mess with them. And I just really feel like the Romulan mail service is probably a thing of Beauty. Because I would imagine that if you fuck up, you get executed.
[00:44:31] Speaker B: Really good point.
[00:44:32] Speaker A: I just wanted to say it's ironic that you say Klingons aren't really possessive because that means they don't really Klingon to stuff. Okay, go.
[00:44:44] Speaker B: I also think everything that. Everything that a Klingon would care about owning for a long time is made out of stuff. Steal.
[00:44:52] Speaker C: Yeah. And he's got it with him all the time. He's not having mom send him care packages at college. Yeah, but it just.
[00:45:00] Speaker B: It really feels like Klingon society, they're just like, well, your weapons, your clothes and your favorite mug are all steel so that you're set. Right?
[00:45:09] Speaker C: Like, you know, planing to a Klingon because your package arrived like a little bit bent and damaged. They would, like, they would just stab you for being a wuss and complaining about it. Like there would. You would get no sympathy from the Klingon Postmaster General.
[00:45:24] Speaker B: None. Ever.
I also like the Romulans because I don't know what it is, but I just think cloaking technology would make my packages arrive faster. I don't know why.
[00:45:36] Speaker C: No, no, no, that's a good point. I didn't think about that. But you're absolutely right. Yeah.
[00:45:41] Speaker B: Like, it feels a little irrational. Like, why would this ship being invisible make my package get here faster? I don't know. I feel like it would.
[00:45:49] Speaker C: No, I feel like it would too because, like, if you, you know, if you're, if you're flying through space and you like, see an enemy ship or something, like, if you don't have cloaking technology, you're like, oh, gotta deal with this guy first before we like, go on to our next stop and Romulan can just like cloak that ship. And we're like, we're just gonna. We're gonna go around. We were never even here. And you just like, continue on your way. You probably have to like, stop for a lot fewer obstacles if you travel at high speed when you're cloaked.
[00:46:16] Speaker A: Okay, I'm voting for space on Mamdani for invisible package trucks.
[00:46:22] Speaker B: You're definitely not paying the full tariff rate on a. On a cloaked ship. Right? Like, yeah, they're going to get around.
They're going to help you out on problems like that.
[00:46:34] Speaker A: Are you suggesting crimes?
[00:46:36] Speaker B: No.
[00:46:37] Speaker A: Oh, okay, good. Yeah. You know what they say. Be straight, never commit a crime, ever.
[00:46:44] Speaker B: That is the popular phrase.
Who, who, who would be the most likely to tamper with your male of these three? Garruk, Quark or Odo?
[00:46:57] Speaker C: Oh, my God, that is so. Oh, that's so good. Because they all would for different reasons.
They all would.
They absolutely all would. Okay, so. So I guess.
Oh, this is brilliant.
I.
I think I. Okay, here's. Here's what I think. This is very hard to rank. I think that I'm gonna choose Odo first only because he is the most likely to believe he is morally right to do it and just tell you to your face like, yeah, I went through your mail where it's like, Garruk would be like, sneaky about it. Like Garrick would.
[00:47:36] Speaker B: Would.
[00:47:36] Speaker C: Garak would only do it if it was like, there is a high chance that there is something in this person's mail that I need to access or want to know or whatever.
[00:47:47] Speaker B: It has to be a part of an active scheme.
[00:47:49] Speaker C: And Quark would do it if he was like, there's something in this that I want to steal or sell or blackmail you over or whatever. And I think Odo might just do it based on your vibes because he has the soul of a cop. And I, and I do love Odo, but I. Odo, I'm rewatching Deep Space Nine now with my girlfriend who lives in the uk. She's never seen it. And so we do, like, long distance TV dates. And a lot of these episodes I haven't seen, you know, in 20 years. And there are times where I'm just like, odo, I love you, but you make it really hard to love you because you are doing some hella racial profiling.
[00:48:28] Speaker A: So the cab applies to Odo and it sucks.
[00:48:31] Speaker B: It sucks how. It sucks how obviously telegraphed it is that, like, he just isn't getting laid. And then he starts getting laid and he's like, oh, maybe I should chill out a little bit. You're like, you, man, you.
[00:48:44] Speaker C: All of a sudden, he's delightful. He's like, wow, it really was that easy. Okay. Yeah. But, yeah, I think. I think I would rank him the most likely because he would believe that he has.
He has the right and indeed that it is his responsibility to, like, know everything that's going on at the station. Be like, up in everybody's business, you know, I. For comedy purposes. I love it when he, like, makes himself a chair to eavesdrop on private conversations. But there are some potential problems with that, you know? So I think just his.
His unquestioned belief in his own right to know everybody else's shit in case there's a problem later makes me feel like he's probably the most likely in the most different kinds of situations to be going through your mail. Whereas, like, Quark and Garrick, it would be something very, like, specific and targeted that they want and not like a pattern necessarily. Necessarily.
That's a great question.
[00:49:51] Speaker B: I think that's reasonable. Although I could. I could just see Court going through everybody's mail just to be safe.
[00:49:58] Speaker C: That is true. That is true. Just to see, like, just test it every week he just goes through and kind of scans it and like, what is stealable today? Yeah, that is.
[00:50:07] Speaker B: Well, you think about how many times he just is, like, poking around the cargo holds just like.
[00:50:12] Speaker C: Yeah, that's true.
[00:50:13] Speaker B: Anything good here right now?
You know, he might do. He might do a touch of mail fraud in his time. We love the hat here, but don't.
[00:50:29] Speaker A: Voters at home don't commit any male crimes. Do not commit a male crime.
[00:50:34] Speaker B: Do not. Because the, the, the. The male police don't have enough to do. They.
They. They're like, they're like a hyper focused sort of like, enforcement group and so don't do one of the very specific crimes that they're looking for because it's all. It's all they've got to do.
[00:50:53] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:50:56] Speaker B: On that subject, what's the, like, similar equivalent in the Federation of the United States Postal Inspection Service? Who are, who's. Who's the, like, overly bored, very specific. I know that there's stuff like this in the Federation. What's. What's the most bored, most specific thing we can come up with?
[00:51:17] Speaker C: Oh, like, as sort of the analog to the male cops. Oh, I have a great one.
The incredible, phenomenal, genius, brilliant Deep Space Nine episode where they go back in time and end up in the trouble with Tribbles introduces us to the time travel cops, who are two of the funniest characters in all of Deep Space Nine.
It's these two, and they're both like recognizable comedic character actors where you're just like, oh, it's that guy from that thing. You know, but they are just like the most like, bored, exasperated suits. And they're just sitting there with their notepad while Cisco is like, you know, so here's what happened. And it keeps, like, cutting back to them sort of rolling their eyes and they have like. It's so funny. Like, they're just like, oh, my God, it's like Kirk, like, how many, you know, time travel violations did we have to write? Like, it sort of introduces you to this, which is like, so funny. They sort of. It introduces the implication that, like, all along, through all of these franchises that We've never seen before. In the background, from time to time, the time travel cops show up and like, give you a citation for time travel fuckery. And they have all of these like, in violation of, you know, statute, blah, blah, blah, 36B clause alpha. Like, they're very extremely like bureaucracy wonks. But because it's all about like, you know, we accidentally went back in time and, you know, did whatever. Like they're.
They take things that like, to us were like, you know, a classic episode of Star Trek time travel television. And they're like, man, this made so much paperwork for us. And it's just like that, like, as a comedic device, I found always on that so funny. And it's really hilarious to kind of imagine them doing that like in other settings. But I feel like in terms of like a. A really specific niche of like, overly policing and bureaucratizing something like that, where it's like, I'm in charge of one type of crime and I have like an encyclopedic knowledge of like every single little like rule and statute and violation that is like, related to it. I think it is totally those two guys.
[00:53:33] Speaker B: It's a really strong case. I think the only thing I could think of that might be a good contender against that would be the genetics. Genetics modification violation.
[00:53:45] Speaker C: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:53:47] Speaker B: Because that. They really. They really seem like they definitely don't have enough to do because to be frank, people do be breaking the time travel rules kind of often.
[00:53:58] Speaker C: Yeah, that's true. It does. It happens a lot. Yeah.
[00:54:02] Speaker B: Whereas the issue of genetic modification comes up. Illegal genetic modification comes up quite a bit less. But there are specific cops whose job is to enforce that issue. In Star Trek.
[00:54:16] Speaker C: Yeah.
There's a great episode of Strange New Worlds where.
Where number one, Una has to go through a whole court case on basically like, being from a. From a race that practices genetic modification as like a cultural practice. And. Yeah, and it's like a whole. And it's not just like. It's not just against the law. There's like, specific, like, you can't be in Starfleet, like that she's, you know, like her. Her career in Starfleet is at risk because this is something that is perceived as being like, so bad that it is like, disqualifying for you to be a representative of the Federation. Which is. Which is shitty. And like, it is. That's a rule that I don't agree with. Whereas I do feel like time travel probably should have some guardrails around it. But. But yeah, that is. That's A whole. That's a whole other thing.
[00:55:08] Speaker A: Very spicy issue with all this talk of male cops. I just want to say female cops, because I support women's rights and women's wrongs. I support women's rights and women's wrong.
[00:55:22] Speaker C: Well, if you support women's wrongs, you will really like Star Trek.
[00:55:25] Speaker B: Yeah, you'll love certain seasons of Star Trek.
How do you get a letter to Q? Can you get a letter to Q?
And on that subject, we're gonna talk about in a second who would run the best Space Dead Letter Office? So I just want to kind of preview that to think about as possibly relevant.
[00:55:49] Speaker C: Good question. I. I guess, I mean, I guess to me, I feel like if I. If I had information of some kind and it was important to me to get it to Q in a timely fashion, it really does not feel like you could do better than to just like give it to Picard, who I believe in my heart that Q is always watching.
[00:56:15] Speaker B: Okay.
[00:56:15] Speaker C: Just kind of like always keep an eye on him. Just checking in, you know, from the. From the Q continuum somewhere. Like watching him in the shower, eavesdropping on his zoom calls. Like, I think that there's just like. I think some portion of Q's omniscience is always checking in on, like, what's Jean Luc doing today?
[00:56:35] Speaker B: It's a reasonable point.
Yeah. I think you could just. You could just give a letter to Jean Luc Picard and be like, get this to you. It might take a few days.
It'll work. Yeah.
[00:56:49] Speaker C: Q would show up. Yeah.
[00:56:50] Speaker B: Yeah.
That's great. What about this? On the subject of that, I mean, definitely some letters for Q are going to end up in the Space Dead Letter Office.
I've come up with some contenders here for people, I think, who might be able to do a good job of running or an interesting job of running the Space Dead Letter Office. But I'm also open to other ideas. The ones I had written down was Gowron. I think Gowron would run a spicy Dead Letter Office. Gowron, the Fenris Rangers?
[00:57:26] Speaker C: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:57:28] Speaker B: When he was still drinking a lot.
I just don't think he could do it afterwards. I think the stress would. I don't think it work out. I think the Grand Nagus, either the original or maybe as a spicy choice, Socialist Negus. Rom, question mark.
What do you think? Do you think I've got some strong picks here or you got something better?
[00:57:49] Speaker C: No. You have some good ones? I guess. So to help me answer this question effectively, tell me a little Bit more about what are the obligations on the person who is the head of the dead letter office.
[00:58:01] Speaker A: So the idea of the dead. Yeah, yeah. So the idea of the dead letter office is this is the male that we can't figure out. And it doesn't have a clear destination.
It's not clear where it came from. So the mail comes to here, and it's their job to use whatever technology they can to figure out where it goes. Dead Letter office is one of the few times where it is legal to peep into the mail only to gather clues on where it's supposed to go.
[00:58:35] Speaker C: Okay, so it is an investigative job.
[00:58:38] Speaker A: Yeah, it's an investigative job.
[00:58:39] Speaker C: Okay. Okay, then.
[00:58:41] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:58:43] Speaker C: I think Fenris Rangers is a great one because it is sort of twofold, right? You're investigating you to find where it goes. And then presumably, if this is in space, you have to find that person and get it to them.
And the Fenwer strangers, sort of having a kind of underground network spread out all over space feels like a good.
Who's, like a good fit for that.
I think also I might loop in Paul Stamets from Discovery, who is, of course connected to the mycelial network which powers the Discovery ship and has sort of psionic tentacles through space and time that allow the ship to jump, but also sort of are connected kind of interplanarly, like the sort of. For anyone who hasn't seen Discovery, who's listening, their ship has a. It's called. They call it the Spore Drive and essentially Stamets, Anthony Rapp's character for musical theater gays, he, like, goes into this booth and it sort of injects this, like, black sort of sludge into his veins and his eyeballs go white. It's all very sci fi. And then he sort of pilots the ship with his brain a little bit by navigating through this sort of network of space mycelium. And so that ship can, like, bop from one location to another in seconds that would take another starship, like, years to travel to. So I feel like that's just like the spore drive in general would be a great asset for this. And then Stamets, being sort of tapped into the mycelium, might be very well positioned to be able to figure out, like, where to go, how to get there efficiently, because, you know, then, like, you. You find the dead letter, and then if you had access to this board drive, you could get it to where it was going, you know, that day, as opposed to them having to wait another, you know, like Years and years and years to get it back. So I feel like that would be highly efficient.
[01:00:54] Speaker B: Strong case.
Yeah, no, I didn't think about that. That's. That's pretty compelling.
[01:00:59] Speaker A: I just want to say, what are our bodies? Excep. Our own starships that we control with our brains.
[01:01:06] Speaker C: Oh, that's beautiful.
I'm just piloting my little starship through space by walking around a. I love that.
[01:01:15] Speaker B: That's right. This is very good. This is. This is a wholesome episode.
Are you familiar with victory mail, Claire?
[01:01:24] Speaker C: I am not.
[01:01:26] Speaker B: Andy, you know what to do.
[01:01:27] Speaker A: Victory mail, it's the veil of victory.
We're gonna win the world.
[01:01:34] Speaker B: War.
[01:01:35] Speaker A: I probably said that wrong, but World War II.
[01:01:41] Speaker C: I assumed it was something to do with World War II. Okay, go ahead.
[01:01:43] Speaker A: Yeah. It was basically a special process for doing mail in a secure way. But the only reason why we're talking about it is because, one, it was needed for the sake of war, and two, it's called victory mail. Because America.
[01:02:04] Speaker B: We love some victory mail.
[01:02:06] Speaker A: Yeah.
And victory females, women's rights and women's wrongs.
[01:02:12] Speaker B: So which crisis would justify the Federation having its own victory mail is.
[01:02:20] Speaker C: So is it. Is the concept of it meaning, like, this was, like. It was, like, extra secure. Did it, like, not go through normal channels? Was this, like, an attempt to prevent theft? Was it encrypted?
[01:02:30] Speaker A: Like, what are we talking more encrypted.
Making sure A lot of it was making sure there wasn't bad information. Like, there was a bit of making sure things were. Yeah.
Trying to check what's in it as well.
[01:02:47] Speaker C: Oh, okay. Okay. So, like, making sure that nobody was, like, writing a letter that somebody could, you know, swipe that might give away, like, where their husband's deployment was. Okay, yeah, got it, got it.
The Mayor, I think.
Well, I mean, I do.
I mean, I guess this is. I keep talking about Deep Space Nine because it's sort of. It's what's fresh in my mind a lot, but the Dominion War, I think that seemed to encompass enough different parties. The Klingons get into it, then the Romulans get into it, then the Cardassians get into it.
And Deep Space Nine being a sort of a space station that is kind of a way post for lots of different people kind of coming and going. I wonder if that might be a situation where. I mean, it probably was happening. Right. Like, there were, like, Cardassians on the station whose communications home were probably being, like, you know, spied on to make sure that they weren't saying anything. Especially because, like, you know, if the station got, like. If the station got an early warning of, like, everybody, like, we're evacuating, you know, because we think that there's, like, the Dominions coming through the wormhole and we're going to get the civilians off the station. That's the kind of thing where, like, if a civilian who was being evacuated from Deep Space Nine, like, called their mom on Earth and was like, we're all being evacuated, that could, like, create a huge panic on Earth. Like, oh, my God, are we, like, at war? You know, So I think that they're, like, because of where they're located, being sort of the first Federation station kind of on a battlefront. I would imagine that strategic communication blackouts, or at least, like, heavily policing. Who's allowed to write home and say what probably happened a lot during all the Dominion stuff? Especially with all the, like, the changelings of it all, you know, like, the last thing that you'd want anybody, like, on a, you know, civilian Federation planet that isn't involved in all of this DS9 stuff to find out about is, like, oh, yeah, you know how, like, just randomly, like, the head of the Klingons and Federation generals and whatever have been, like, replaced by change. Like, they would not want that information getting out. So I feel like anyone with any knowledge of that kind of shit going down is probably having their mail inspected.
[01:05:21] Speaker B: Fair enough.
[01:05:22] Speaker A: I just want to say, as somebody not too, too familiar with Star Trek, every time you say Kardashian, I think you mean Kardashian. And I'm sorry, if I ever watch Star Trek, I'm not watching the Kardashian episodes.
[01:05:35] Speaker C: There is a hilarious T shirt that I like, screen cap the picture, and I've had it on my phone for, like, a million years.
That's a logo for, like, it's like a fake TV show logo. And it says Keeping up with the Cardassians. And it has, like, three Kardashian ladies with sort of that, like, early 2000s kind of like, Kim K. Hair making, like, bit chases of the camera. And it's very funny.
[01:06:01] Speaker A: I support women's rights and wrongs. I support that shirt.
[01:06:05] Speaker B: We definitely support this shirt. Yeah.
What would be your favorite special limited edition subspace postage stamps?
Well, who would have the coolest, the coolest run of stamps that everybody would be dying to get?
[01:06:24] Speaker C: This is. Okay, so this is a great question. I think let's just assume if sort of standard USPS rules apply that, like, captains always get them, and, like, that's not Very interesting, right? Like, captain stamps. Like, those would be easy to get. That would be like your standard. Like, every year there's like, a new captain, and you're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Of course, everyone has different card stamps, so if you rule that out. So I feel like, like the dream, like, the one that would be the, like, you know, valuable to a collector later would be somebody, like, kind of like really, like, random and obscure and. Or actually.
Or somebody that, like, they did a run of stamps and then, like, that person turned out to be evil, and then they had to, like, take the stamps back. That would be really funny, too.
[01:07:04] Speaker B: That'd be interesting.
[01:07:05] Speaker C: I. Let's see.
[01:07:07] Speaker A: I.
[01:07:08] Speaker C: Well, I guess, you know what? You know who I think deserves a stamp just sort of broadly, because I feel like she deserves more attention than the franchise ever seems willing to give her, and that is Michael Burnham. I love Michael Burnham. I love Discovery. I think she's an amazing character. And for.
For obvious reasons, you know, like, if you introduce a character who is Spock's sister in the prequel show, then you do have to give a plausible narrative justification for why when, like, this sort of strange New worlds timeline catches up to the original series. Like, why has he never mentioned that he has a sister? And so there's a whole thing where, like, you know, the ship jumps a thousand years into the future and it's all hushed up and so, like, no one's allowed to talk about it. And they all, you know, have to, like, say that she died and it's all sort of, like, classified, but, like. But I think. But she was like. She was like. They were all Starfleet officers who had, like, lives and careers and stuff. And they aren't, like, erased from history because there's this.
A class of shuttle that's named after Stamets. So, like, it clearly is like, these people exist in, you know, in future Star Trek canon. It's just that the story was that they all died when Discovery blew up because they hushed up, that they went to the future.
But the thing that drives me crazy about strange new worlds, the further away that it sort of gets from the pilot, which kind of really bridged Discovery Bridge into the new show, is it's like the show itself seems to have totally forgotten that Spock ever had a sister.
And they'll do all these episodes or conversations about, like, Spock's childhood, Spock's upbringing, Spock's kind of half human nature, and I'm just like, you know, who would fit in really perfectly to this conversation that you are having right now is if you remembered that you had a human sister your whole life.
So I think just like. I think Michael Burnham Stamp, I think would be a great, like.
Like, she. She. And it would, you know, like, it would have to be very sort of like. Because they all think that she died. So it would have, like, you know, like funeral lilies or be sort of like a fallen hero. And that would be obviously very, like, emotional for Spot because he has to pretend like she's dead. But I. I feel like. I feel like she deserves, like, she. She really needs to be, like, front and center and like a Federation hero, I think much more than she is in canon.
[01:09:38] Speaker A: You know, unrelated to that. I really think they should have given Smock a sister.
[01:09:44] Speaker C: What a brilliant idea.
[01:09:45] Speaker B: They should have a really interesting storyline. Would have added something.
[01:09:50] Speaker C: If only, if only.
[01:09:52] Speaker A: But right here, why don't you acknowledge me? If only Spock had a sister.
[01:09:59] Speaker C: I can almost hear voice.
[01:10:01] Speaker A: Don't ask why Spock's non existent sisters in my house. Don't.
[01:10:07] Speaker B: Localize entirely in your kitchen.
[01:10:09] Speaker A: Yes.
[01:10:10] Speaker B: Can I see her?
[01:10:12] Speaker A: No.
[01:10:13] Speaker B: All right, I got a complicated question here. Who gets the royalties for the Tuvik stamp?
[01:10:21] Speaker C: Janeway. Because she created it.
I guess that's.
[01:10:28] Speaker B: That's a reasonable enough answer.
[01:10:30] Speaker A: Yeah, good answer. Good answer. Family feud voice. Good answer.
[01:10:37] Speaker B: Who would issue the strongest, most durable and lasting forever stamp? Federation?
Romulans? Klingons? Wormhole aliens? Someone else?
[01:10:50] Speaker C: You know who I think? I think it would be? I. I think we're overlooking the Ferengi distaste at paying for something you shouldn't have to pay for. I think that the Ferengi would be like, I'm buying. I. I am not buying stamps. Again, like, I am. I am. You're not nickel and diming me for, like, new stamps every year or, like, jacking the price up or whatever. Like I. They. They would. They, like, in addition to obviously wanting to make money all the time, they get very annoyed. And if you are taking money from them that they feel like you shouldn't be taking. So I feel like by that token alone, they will be like, I'm not buying another one of those fucking things.
[01:11:33] Speaker B: I already bought one strong case that the Ferengis would be into their forever stamps.
I can't dispute this.
Okay, Our final vote of the day.
[01:11:46] Speaker A: Final vote, people.
[01:11:48] Speaker B: Claire, thank you so much for being a gracious voter here at the. At the ballot booth with us today.
[01:11:55] Speaker C: You know, space democracy is important.
[01:11:57] Speaker B: Yeah, well, I just appreciate that, you know, that you made the Effort to make this your first time to come out to the battle.
[01:12:08] Speaker A: As opposed to Earth democracy, which is not important. Only space democracy.
Only space democracy. Who cares about democracy here on planet Earth?
Important distinction.
[01:12:24] Speaker B: The big question. How much faster does Voyager get back if they have 50 books of Forever stamps? That's right. 50 of them.
[01:12:36] Speaker A: That's a lot of books. I guess you could say you really threw the book at home.
[01:12:46] Speaker C: Well, that is.
That's a great question. I mean, I guess I would say what's tricky about that is that it presupposes the notion that getting home as fast as possible is the sole goal of Voyager. But I think in a way, because of all of the adventures that they had together, that the real Forever Stamp was the friends we made along the way.
[01:13:15] Speaker B: I.
I knew you were about to say that.
[01:13:18] Speaker C: Yes.
[01:13:19] Speaker B: Yes.
[01:13:20] Speaker A: I like this guest.
I like this guest.
Maybe the real one piece is 50 books of forever Stamps. You ever think of that?
[01:13:34] Speaker B: It takes.
Yeah, I think that'd be great, actually. If they open. If they get the.
Into the end, Luffy and his friends open the chest and it just.
A ton of Forever Stamps.
That would. That would change. That would change the course of history.
[01:13:52] Speaker A: Sure.
[01:13:52] Speaker B: Yeah, I. I'll say. No, I agree that. I agree that, you know, it is about the friends that they make along the way, but also, it does take seven years for them to get home.
[01:14:06] Speaker C: It is. I do. I'm. I'm really delighted by the sort of the visual image of like every. Like a book of Forever Stamps. And every time you stick one on the warp core, it goes a little faster. And so they get home like, they get home in like 15 minutes. And you walk in and the warp core is just like plastered with Forever Stamps.
[01:14:32] Speaker A: This is how science works.
[01:14:34] Speaker C: Yeah, that really made me laugh.
[01:14:38] Speaker B: No, see, I'm thinking, you know, they're traveling all these strange places. They're trying to trade with people. Sometimes they're not sure what they can trade. Well, now they've got. Now they've got something they can trade anywhere. Rangi Forever Stamps.
[01:14:54] Speaker C: Although, I mean, here's the thing, and I don't know if this opens up new territory we don't have time to get into in our final ballot, but you know, are. What is the value of a Ferengi Forever Stamp? If you are in the.
Is it Gamma Quadrant, Delta Quadrant, and you never do business with Ferengi. Like, what is. To the Kazon, what is the value of a Ferengi Forever Stamp? Like, is the value of the stamp subjective? Because you have to be part of their. Their, like, commerce network for it to have value. Like what? In a way. What is a stamp?
[01:15:33] Speaker A: I feel like there's an episode where they establish value. I don't know. That sounds like it would be a Star Trek episode. They convinced them to give it value.
[01:15:41] Speaker C: Yeah, the universal value of a stamp, like the gold standard. But it's for stamps.
[01:15:46] Speaker B: That would be the name of an episode right there.
Here's what I think. Now, you have to have the sales skills of a Ferengi to truly sell this point that I'm making. But here's what I think. What you should be trying to sell people on is the idea that it doesn't matter if they're not doing business with the Ferengi right now. These stamps are good forever.
So whenever they do start doing business with the Ferengi, if it takes time, they'll have appreciated value. They'll be worth more than then. They are nasty.
[01:16:28] Speaker C: You know who that wouldn't work on, of course, is the wormhole aliens who do not live in linear time, who are always asking questions like, what's yesterday? Like, they don't like that.
[01:16:39] Speaker B: That really presupposes they can only issue forever stamps. Oh, my God.
[01:16:45] Speaker A: I found out how to solve the US Economy. We just have to stop living in linear time.
[01:16:51] Speaker C: It was right in front of us. It's so easy.
[01:16:57] Speaker A: I'm telling the President immediately. I don't live in linear time. Who's the President? It's Biden. Right? There's no way we would. We would do Donald Trump. Anybody like that.
[01:17:07] Speaker B: Actually, the President is James Garfield.
[01:17:11] Speaker A: He loves lasagna and hates Mondays.
[01:17:16] Speaker B: I know authors love requests. You should. You should definitely write your next time travel series about saving James Garfield. A personal obsession of mine that I've developed recently.
[01:17:27] Speaker C: Are you watching the show about Charles Guiteau?
[01:17:29] Speaker B: I did. I watched it.
[01:17:31] Speaker C: I haven't seen it yet, but Assassins is my favorite musical. And that's sort of where all of my James Garfield information comes from.
[01:17:38] Speaker B: But.
[01:17:39] Speaker C: But it's great.
[01:17:40] Speaker B: It's really fun. And we're definitely going to talk about it on this show because.
[01:17:43] Speaker C: Oh, fun. Okay. I will tune in for that.
[01:17:45] Speaker B: It is the vibe. It is the vibe of our listenership.
[01:17:48] Speaker C: Yeah. Yeah.
[01:17:50] Speaker A: I should probably watch this. Vote on this beforehand, then.
[01:17:53] Speaker B: Anyway, this was some good voting. We. We voted our hearts out.
We voted our lungs out. We voted our minds away. And I'm just so glad that we had the opportunity to vote with you today. Claire Willett. What a. What a pleasure thank you for joining us. This has been really fun.
[01:18:12] Speaker C: I had such a good time. I feel like we have all learned a lot. I feel like we have really, like, we have proposed some ideas that I feel like the world should take note of. I think we, like, got a lot done here today, so I appreciate you all letting me experience what a ballot box feels like.
[01:18:31] Speaker A: Yeah, I know the rule of threes, and saying that one more time would break the rule of threes, because this is my fourth time saying it. I don't care. I believe in women's rights and women's wrongs.
I'm willing to break the rule of threes for him.
[01:18:47] Speaker B: Well, speaking of the rule of threes, I'm gonna Claire let you mention where people can find you for a second time, because that's getting closer to three.
Where do they go if they want to something by you?
[01:19:04] Speaker C: Well, I'm on Blue sky all the time at clairewillett. C L A I R E W I L L E E T T.
And that is probably the place to find my yelling about both politics and Star Trek and book news when there is book news. So, yeah, find me there. I'm always online.
[01:19:28] Speaker B: Very good. And you're also always online. Find the show, Find us. You know what to do. It's all in the show notes. All right, let's get out of here. Bye, everybody. Bye. Three.
